For My Single Ladies
For All My Single Ladies
Love is definitely in the air and wedding season is still going strong. I got to thinking just last night about how beautiful it is when two people genuinely love one another and how awesome it is when God is a part of the scenario. People are different so not all relationships work the same, but I'm convinced that when God plays a role in dating, it really brings a different dynamic to things. I am blessed in that I grew up in a home where I saw true love. It is a blessing because not everyone does and so I don't take it for granted. While I've never been the one to worry about when I'm going to get married, my issue has always been that I didn't think I was the girl who would get married. I think my mom is happy that I no longer think this way but let me tell you, I'm in no rush!
In a general sense many women put a timetable on events like marriage. The waiting game lingers on and frustration increases every year. I am convinced that sometimes God is protecting us in seasons of waiting whether we realize it or not. When it comes to dating, it can be easy to ignore every single sign that there is just no purpose in the relationship. Heartbreak and constant disappointment could be starring us in the face but with a kiss on the forehead, we push it to the back of our minds. (I am more than guilty of this in the past.) It becomes easy to get stuck in this mindset that to have anyone is better than having no one at all. As Christian women, that's the wrong mentality to have. Over the last year, I've had to really take a deeper look at why I dated who I dated in the past and why they're no longer around. To be very honest I think I was doing the whole dating thing completely wrong. My perspective has changed and for me dating with purpose means being led by God in who I give my heart to. Dating with purpose means getting to truly know someone and not being afraid to walk away if I know God is telling me to do just that. It means being patient and not settling for what's convenient at the time.
When we leave God out of the dating equation, we are essentially leaning on our own understanding. I've dealt with enough heart break in my life that I no longer even trust myself when it comes to who I decide to give my heart to. If God doesn't give me the green light, then game over. Like all things, we ought to really trust God in every season of our lives, whether married or single. Waiting and trusting that God knows best is not always an easy thing but one thing I know for certain is that God's timing is always perfect. In those quiet moments when you're feeling down and discouraged, pray for peace, but also pray for purpose. I think when we take our focus off of what we don't have and begin to focus on what we do have AND what God has called us to do, there really isn't much time left to dwell on the things that haven't happened yet for us.
Through my own experiences, I now understand that love should never be forced. It isn't perfect either but with God, two people who are equally invested can get through anything. Know that you are complete now and not when you meet your future spouse. Know that there is purpose where you are in life. Don't miss the lessons you're meant to learn in the season you're in because you've convinced yourself you're ready for the next chapter of your life. Don't settle either! Don't rush through the season you're in to appease others or to fill a temporary void. Be present in the season you are in. I'm reminding myself of all these things as well. God knows exactly who and what you need and when you need it. If it be His will that you get married one day, you don't have to worry about a thing. God will handle the details!
P.S. I'm trying to stay away from sweets, hence the picture.The struggle is real. Share and, or leave a comment by clicking the title of this blog. Happy Sunday.
Originally posted: Sunday, September 6, 2015